Thursday, March 09, 2006
Wednesday, March 08, 2006
So what are my issues you ask? Well, on the surface it was the diminishing relationship between my roommate and I which was based on shots that went back an forth that included subliminal shots, shots that could have been taken the wrong way, misinterpreted statements of hypocracy and things like that were the things that were bothering me. And what bothered me is that they were said and that they were from people that I didn't expect to be saying that which really disturbed me. So that was, superficially, what was the issue that caused drama.
Deeper than that was my insecurities. My constant unhappiness/depression that has been keeping me down and essentially puts me down whenever I'm here in Carbondale. On top of that is my general unhappiness and awkwardness around couples, especially me being the single kid. On top of that, my main issue with the situation was seeing how things between a certain couple went and my jealousy. Not necessarily the jealousy of the couple themselves as a whole, but the jealousy that I haven't been in that situation and my belief that they take each other for granted. Those were my issues. In fact, that didn't come out until the end when something struck a cord and I nearly flipped and almost didn't wanna talk about it. In fact I didn't want to talk about it because of the reasons that I didn't wanna have that conversation with those people in general because I didn't want to be around for the reaction. It turned out being the best decision I made all night. It changed the mood of the conversation, it changed the tone in which everyone spoke and really resolved things. If you were here, you could pin point that as the turning point in the conversation. Even I am on record of saying before that point I felt that the prior conversation was going around in circles.
All in all, I'm glad it's over because now I can resume things as they were before. Granted I blew another day to work on this paper and yeah, I might be in some trouble when it comes to school. However, as of now, I am at peace with myself, which I believe is the most important thing as of right now.
now to take my meds as it seems like i'm gonna get sick again and then go to bed. good night from carbondale. and by good night i mean that all is well that ends well!!!
Monday, March 06, 2006
- FRIDAY was quite underwhelming. My roommate was very wasted because he started drinking at 1 pm and really ruined my night come to think about it. Not really, I'd just like to think so just because he's such an assbag when he's drunk really he has no right to say shit when I get drunk ever again because I'm easier to take care of, I'm not a hassle, sure I have my insecurities when I'm drunk but I'm the farthest thing from an assclown that you can be. So Friday we ended up out, and it was pretty boring and uneventful. It's because I wasn't drinking, that changes the whole bar scene and party scene in Carbondale, I'm thankful I have only 35 days of this left. So I was quite uncomfortable at the bars and on top of that I really didn't wanna be out in the first place. So basically, Friday=BAD!
- SATURDAY was a bit of a different story. Actually, Saturday was the second best day of this weekend which shouldn't be suprising since Friday sucked the big one. So Saturday really was basketball day. I woke up and turned on UCONN vs. Louisville and UCONN won which was good because with their win they would most likely clinch the #1 team in the country with Dook's loss to Florida State. Then there was the SIU semi-final victory over Northern Iowa which I kinda described in the last blog. It was such a hard fought victory and if you were there you could see how nervous I was, I was friggin twitching like a crack addict. So after the big UNI win all the people that were watching the game gather up the idea to say "hey let's go to St. Louis for the final" and we all bought our tickets and well we were on our way to St. Louis the next day. It was so great because we were all talking about going for the whole weekend next year. But what made this so special is that it was so spur of the moment and everyone was so excited the general mood was "Fuck it, let's go to St. Louis tomorrow!" And believe it or not, that wasn't the highlight of the night. The highlight of the night was the biggest win that I've ever seen the University of North Carolina have (minus the National Championship game) in my history as a UNC fan. Not only did Carolina beat Duke, take all of this into consideration. Duke was #1 at the time. It was Senior Day at Duke, meaning the final game at Cameron Indoor and againt the Heels for JJ, Shelden and Melchioni and all of thos maniachal idiotic fans at that hell whole known as Coach K court. And despite Carolina's slow start and Duke's hot start, for a good portion of the game, UNC was beating Duke by double digits. I really wish now that I woulda blown it up more in my roomie's face cuz I know if it was Duke doing it he'd be up my ass, but us Carolina fans are a little more classy than the Dookies. Take this into consideration too. Carolina came into the game major underdog and no one gave them a chance. Fuck, remember when Carolina came into the season unranked defending national championship. Take into consideration that UNC's core was to include 4 top-15 NBA picks that weren't there, not to forget about Josh Smith who went to the NBA early and Jameson Curry that transferred to Oklahoma State after confrontation with Uncle Roy and those gus were supposed to come in with Marvin Williams. Oh yeah and don't forget the top 4 for UNC, the freshies that outscored Dook's seniors on senior night 55-51. That was the high light of the night. UNC handing it to Dook, the score might have been close, but really Duke was not only spanked on their own court, but really they were pantsed and exposed in front of a national television audience!
- However, without a doubt the highlight of the weekend was the result of the randomness that occured after SIUs win over UNI in the MVC tourney semi finals, and that would be our trip to St. Louis. It was really anticipated, I was hyped for this game, I have been waiting for a moment like this FOR MY ENTIRE LIFE. A championship game, I've never been to a championship game of any kind so this was really special for me. We got to St. Louis and for starters I wasn't impressed with the city itself, it was like something was missing. In fact, St. Louis was more like a suburb for me. So anyways to the highlight was actually the game. First we painted faces, not only ours who were the original intendants of this but random kids that wanted to be painted, Saluki fans only of course. And speaking of Saluki Nation, we deserve a standing ovation from ourselves to ourselves because not only did we show up in droves, we made our presence known from the moment the gates opened. Today Saluki Nation was loud, proud and in the end happy. Throughout the game we made our presence known as fans. And yes, the Salukis did come out slow, but we stayed on the D and we let the D turn into O and suprisingly we were only down one at half time. And that was the last time we were down. Randal Falker (my adopted favorite player) started the second half with a monsterous dunk and for 10 minutes the Bradley Braves were held scoreless. The Dawgs forced numerous turnovers, got several key offensive rebounds, made key defensive plays like blocks and made little plays like blocking out and interrupting the passing lanes. It was very reminiscent of the 20+-to-nothing run against Northern Iowa last year in the second to last home game of the Darren Brooks era. But what was a close game turned into a blow out, complete dominance by SIU, dominance that we saw glimpses of throughout the year and for this weekend they put it all together. This is what we were supposed to see all year. But really, it was symbolic of what happens when a team has their backs against a wall. Hopefully we carry this momentum into the NCAA tourney. And to think a few weeks ago we were talking how the NIT would have been good for the young Salukis. Oh yeah and the celebration that took place after the final buzzer, much better than the one at the SIU Arena after last year's regular season title. Something about winning a post-season tournament is so special. For once we get to relax because we know we're in, there will be no sweating it out. Oh yeah and another thing, my advice to the Dawgs. If you guys learned anything from the Bulls dynasty of the 90s, keep the black shoes!!!!
Wow, I'm in such a good mood, I won't even post my insecurities, things I'm mad about and other stuff from this weekend and this past week that's worth posting but not when I'm in a good mood. GO DAWGS! GO SIU! and soon enough I'll be chanting GO CUBS GO!