Friday, January 19, 2007

The Friday Off-The Wall Blog

Oh, so this is what it's like to be in a good mood on a Friday. Cool, I like it. A good week of class, personally I'm revitalized mentally; and now it's time to go drinkin' this weekend and complete a positive seven day period! So why keep waiting. The Happy Friday Topics:
  • Good story to start the week when Illinois Senator Barack Obama began preliminary paper work in his quest for Presidency in 2008. This country is in need of change and Barack is the type of politician that rekindles my interest and faith in the political system. I for one, will vote for him. The question lies within others. Can the simple minded look past the color of his skin? Can his perceived lack of experience cost him in the eyes of voters? Only time will tell.
  • As an avid Facebook person, I found (and joined an interesting group.) As a Bears fan, I've been told by media giants that I'm un-American for not cheering for the Saints this weekend and that not cheering for Drew Brees and Co. is unethical. I understand that Katrina did horrible things to New Orleans that I wouldn't wish on my own most personal enemy but it's a football game. I think if the people down there (and I'm talking from the big wigs down south, to the big wigs in D.C.) helped the rest of the Louisiana area as much as they've helped the football team and the stadium and downtown....the NOLA would be in a lot better shape! And we know the NFL doesn't want to be named in the same sentence as the word rigged, but if the Saints do win, all bets are off. With all that said, Go Bears!
  • From Vallejo, CA. A cell phone apparently ignited in a man's pocket and started a fire that burned his hotel room and caused severe burns over half his body, fire department officials said. Damn people and their hi-tech, new fangled cell phones. Later, investigators have thrown out that theory, attributing the fire to a flame not being put out properly. Damn phones get hot, what are ya gonna do?
  • From the department of "here comes the apocolypse" comes this story about resident whore Paris Hilton. Paris is supposedly trying to get serious about her acting career. *Let me stop right here and say that Paris' best acting is done on her back.* Back to the story, she's going to be starring in a movie called "The Hottie and The Nottie," a story in which Hilton's character claims she won't get married until her not-so-hot friend gets married. Wow, Hollywood is desperate for new and original scripts. If you think that's bizarre, check out the story here where Paris declares sex as sacred. And by 'scared' she means only to be performed for money on camera. Or the story about her wanting kids after hanging out with new gal pal Britney Spears (who reportedly might be pregnant again...my guess this time is that the baby's daddy is resident assclown Brandon Davis.) Oh gosh, that's just scary!
THE FRIDAY FIVE. Five songs in heavy rotation in my I-Pod this week.
  1. This Ain't A Scene, It's An Arm Race by Fall Out Boy
  2. Through The Glass by Stoned Sour
  3. Ridin' Overseas by Chamillionaire featuring Akon (yet another Ridin' Dirty Remix)
  4. Before He Cheats by Carrie Underwood (also known as a potential future wife)
  5. *Go Too Far* by Jibbs featuring Melody Thornton of The Pussy Cat Dolls
THE FRIDAY FIVE PT. 2 (Old School Edition)
  1. Parents Just Don't Understand by Will Smith (when he was known as The Fresh Prince)
  2. Wanna Be Starting Something by Michael Jackson
  3. *Let's Wait A While* by Janet Jackson
  4. OPP by Naughty By Nature
  5. Shoop by Salt-n-Pepa
*Denotes Lu's Extra Point: On Jibbs (of Does Your Chain Hang Low? fame) album, there's a song, Go Too Far, which features Melody Thornton of the Pussy Cat Dolls. The thing about the song is this. It's basically a song promoting abstinence (which I have no problem with) and on top of that it samples Janet Jackson's (I know, hold your laughter) abstinence theme Let's Wait Awhile. I just see something wrong with a member of the Pussy Cat Dolls who did songs like Don't Cha, Pushin' On My Buttons, etc. singing a song...let alone singing the sampled hook...that promotes abstinence. Maybe it's just me. Enjoy peeps!

Wednesday, January 17, 2007

Lu's Mini-Confessional Blog

Well folks, today marked a new beginning in my collegiate life. Granted, it won't be official until Monday night when I go to my Forms of Poetry class @ 4:00 'til 6:30 PM. But as of now, I've gone to four of my five classes (Forms of Poetry being the fifth class) really have no complaints about any of my classes. Though it's tough to have complaints about classes during the first week, because for the most part the first week is an introductory period. If there's any class I should be worried about it's my Ethnicity and Nationalism class because of its heavy grading based on quizzes, tests and attendance. My Media in Society class is like that as well, and I didn't fare to well the first time I took MCMA 201 my freshman year, but I was a different person then. Now, I feel as if I'm ready for that class. Same for my Psycology 102 class, I think I'm ready for that type of class, and I have friends that excel in those classes and in that field, so I have good help around me. As for my Journalism 310 class, I love it. I have an ability to write, that's undeniable. However, my writing is comparable to a raw talent stewing in the minor leagues, in need of some fine tuning to maximize potential.

As I sit here tonight I've taken the first step to a successful semester, by setting aside an hour to go over the day's assignments. I know, an hour doesn't seem like much, but all I needed to do was read a chapter for each class I have tomorrow, so I'm pretty well off there. But for the first time since my freshman year I did what I set out to do. I set aside time to do school work with no distractions. I was away from my cellphone (which was silenced), my computer, Super Nintendo and anything else that would randomly distract me in my room. I sat in the area with the best lighting (that would be the living room) with the TV off and the radio off as well and I sat down on the couch and methodically read my assignments page by page. It was quite refreshing to be honest. I hope to carry this on for the rest of the semester. I know I can do it, because I've done it before.

Here's where the "confessional" part comes in. I'll admit that for the last year-and-a-half, if not two years, I've been distracted. I've been doing all the wrong things, and that is what has put me in this hole I currently find myself. And I'm talking the academic hole, as well as the social hole. I let my personal life affect my school life, something I've never let happen before and that really set me back mentally. It made me doubt my abilities, my purpose in life, all of that was in question. Never in my life had I questioned my decisions because even if they didn't work out I had a mentality in which I either A) Shook it off and told myself "Hey, at least I tried" or B) That was my own decision, I'll live with the repercussions of my decisions. Not so much the last two years. I've questioned myself, my friends, my intentions...everything. And for what....a lot of added stress that sent me nowhere, fast. So now I'm back to square one, or as close as I can get, to square one as I possibly can being this far into the game. I started off strong here at SIU and my job is to finish strong.

And to close this blog, I'll be honest with you. I see distractions forthcoming in the future. Why? Because they always find their way to you. In life, there is no smooth road. There is no easy path. Nothing is easy. That's why I'm now taking the path of every day, grind it out and see what happens.

That's all for tonight. I hope you enjoyed tonight's version of Lu's Confessional. I hope to bring happier blogs in the near future!

Tuesday, January 16, 2007

Day One, Semester Two, Year Three---Interesting, To Say The Least

Well today was fun. I use that word fun loosely, very loosely in fact. It was cold, windy, wintry. blustery (insert superlative here) type of day. Still, there are several things I pulled out from today.

My two classes weren't terrible, but really what class is terrible after one day? In my journalism class I was re-united with a friend I hadn't seen in a while. I'm trying to figure out how to put this in normative terms....she was the first girl I had a crush on here at SIU. Cute and bubbly, she was a nice girl that got me interested in the musical stylings of Eric Clapton, Jason Mraz and Jack Johnson. It was kind of a shock to see her, but she did remind me that she was a jourrnalism major (like myself), so that totally makes sense that we'd have class together. In fact we have two classes together. I guess that should make up for a year-plus not talking to her. I dunno what to think though, I'm confuzzled in a sense. Not really, since I stopped crushing over her sometime between the rejection period and the end of freshman year. But if there were any questions of being over her or not were answered when no butterflies emerged or anything like that.

My Ethnics and Nationalism course got interesting right away in the description of ethnicity and ethnic groups. What caught my ear, of course, a sports reference. The teacher made a slight argument that the Chicago Bears could be an ethnic group based on the definition. Of course while he mentioned that I could only think about how the Cubdom should be considered an ethnic group. That's another post for another time and another blog. Though I do plan to post it here and at my other site. I'm always drawing comparisons between my life and the Cubs, not like this should shock anyone.

But I'm really excited about my JRNL-310 class. My teacher's name is Anita Stoner and she seems to be a sports nut who used to work on the editorial staff of the Palm Beach Post sports pages. Everyone knows that I've always wanted to be a sports journalist (hence the whole My Damn Cubbies site.)

I'LL USE THE FOLLOWING SPACE FOR THE FOLLOWING:

Hey, my teacher said today "Good writing is a waste when there's no one to read it." I'll be honest, I don't constitute this blog (or note here on Facebook) as good writing (for the most part) though I'll say it should be entertaining somewhat. How to address this, safely.

For the record, I love SIU. For the most part, I love the people I've met, the experiences I've had and so on, and so forth. My love for the University of North Carolina @ Chapel Hill dates back to when I was a child, idolizing Michael Jordan (an alumnus of UNC) so I immediately became a fan of the team and the school. You can't blame me for wanting to go there, you really can't. They have an awesome journalism school, an awesome broadcasting school and an awesome basketball team! But SIU has all that too, though Carolina's a bit more talented but I wouldn't count out the Dawgs for a minute! Besides, had I gone to Carolina I would've never met any of the people here at Southern. I wouldn't have as much of an appreciation for mid-major schools. Tonight's phone call with Meagan would've never happened. And for arguments sake, the "bad" things that have happened here at Southern, who's to say they couldn't have happened at UNC, just with different people. I like SIU, I'm not going anywhere, any time soon.

That's it for tonight. There's more to blog about, but nothing blog-worthy for the night!

A Quick 2nd Semester Preview

WARNING: MOST OF THIS MAKES LITTLE TO NO SENSE WHATSOEVER. PROCEED AT YOUR OWN RISK!

As I begin this post it is 12:44 am on Tuesday January 16th, 2007. Wow. That's all I can say as of right now. There's so much that I have to write, so much that I want to write, but right now my mind isn't communicating well with my typing fingers. That's odd, knowing that this post right here is my 301st on this site. Here goes nothing.

I didn't do a post to preview first semester. I guess I had more of a slight idea what was going on, maybe. I'll tell you this, I was generally a happier person and things were generally better. Everyone got along, everyone was happy with one another, it was like everything was a big ball of sunshine. These days not so much. It's been well documented on this blog, the things I've been through this semester. Drama, drifting, stress....all of it. I guess you can say after this semester things are a lot more clearer, though not necessarily better. I almost lost my best friend, though a part of me feels as if I'm still losing her. I've indirectly helped several holes magically appear in our walls. I think what sucks most about this past semester is that everyone that was once cool with one another, no one really talks that much anymore and really none of us are cool with one another anymore. It'd be a lot easier if I could point the blame on one individual, but I can't. Actually, that best friend of mine put it best when she said that we all went out of our way to "find ourselves" when we should've/could've let it happen naturally.

What does that have to do with 2nd semester preview? Not much, but you can't know where you're going if you don't know where you've been. With that said, my thoughts on this upcoming semester. Arguably, this is the most important semester of my collegiate life. I'm fully adjusted and a majority of my distractions are behind me so I really should have no excuses for failure this semester. I need to prove that I can get good grades again. I need to re-focus and move forward with each and every day. Personally, I need to set high standards and proceed with a purpose, as I did my freshman year at SIU.

But so much has changed since high school. Let's recap, shall we? I blew off/blew my chance at going to my dream school, University of North Carolina @ Chapel Hill, because of A) distance and B) money though comparatively speaking I wouldn't be spending much more and technically I did myself a real disservice by not attending the #1 public university in the country. I blew my chance at my theoretical dream girl and really I have no excuse for that at all. I blew it; no ifs, ands or buts about it. I choked and everyday I must live with things like "what could've been" and certain conversations and things that were said that I wish would just leave my mind. With all that said, I don't want to blow any more chances. I've lost out on two of the things I've always wanted, I don't feel like doing that anymore, I don't feel like going through that anymore. Heck I don't want to go through it ever again.

As this semester rapidly approaches (as it is now 1:00 am) I can't help but think that I am behind here at SIU. By behind, I mean behind socially and academically. I guess I was behind socially in high school as well, but I didn't mind it as much because academically I was where I was supposed to be for the most part and in some parts I was ahead of the game. Here at SIU, I've underachieved academically and socially, despite the many friends I have made, I feel as if I'm missing something.

A part of me wants to find that missing something, while another part of me wants to desperately move on and straighten things out academically. Everyone tells me "good things come to those who wait," while I now lie under the theory "better things happen to those who go and get them" and I have waited long enough and suffered long enough to basically come the the realization that the whole "good things come to those who wait" line is an absolute piece of garbage ass lies! Yes, I know I sound bitter (and I'm rambling) but it's completely worth it as I sit here typing listening to Kenneth "Babyface" Edmunds sing some of the greatest love songs ever written.

As I read through this post, I realize I really don't get to the point of previewing this semester. So instead of deleting all that stuff, I'll bullet point what's to come in this semester.
  • Hopefully I can stay on task and focused from January 16th 'til the end of May. I'm talking about school work focused, because supposedly the rest will magically fall in place when school ends (though that's what they said after HS that everything (socially) would fall into place when I came to Southern)
  • Proving I belong here at SIU is something I desperately want to do.
  • Focus, determination, purpose and motivation. Four things I've been lacking since freshman year. Four things I want to regain this semester.
  • Confidence. I need it, bad. I don't know where to get it, but once again I guess it's something that magically appears....kinda like the Yankee Ghosts that Derek Jeter talks about.
  • Happy. I'm tired of being angry, bitter, cranky, pissed off, depressed all the damn time. I want to be happy for consecutive days and not have to write a blog about how amazing it is that I'm happy for consecutive days.
With all that said, the best approach for this semester is one day at a time. Take every day and cherish it. Work hard in all of my classes every day Monday thru Friday, weekends if necessary. This is going to be different. This is going to be difficult. But as I've learned, life isn't easy, because if it was easy and if we got everything we ever wanted it wouldn't be worth anything. A friend told me that once. A good friend in fact.

As I finish this post, the time is 1:11 am.