Friday Fun: News, Notes & More about Friday Nite

Friday started off like every other Friday, English @ 9 am that no one went to, boring Media in Society class that included "Richard Simmons in a Spider Man Suit", the difference between US radio stations and Kenyan radio stations is that our radio stations work and play music and gratuitous T-n-A from MTV India that mocked American values. Look, just cuz our chicks are hotter than yours, doesn't mean that you should be hating on us. And all-in-all, class sucked, but it was FRIDAY, and that means you can screw around as much as you want because on Monday everything goes back to normal. The pre-game took place in my room. For those of you keeping score at home, pre-gaming is when you drink before you go out drinking. For all intents and purposes, its getting drunk before getting absolutely FUBR (fucked up beyond recognition.) I wasn't there for that because I went to go to a friends room to play Madden. I whooped him. 59-42 Colts over the Falcons. The final score doesn't do me justice when it comes to the whoopin this kid took. I knocked out all 3 of his quarterbacks at one point (Michael Vick and Doug Johnson for the game). I scored touchdowns by passing (Manning to Harrison 68 yds on the 1st play), Running (58 yd. TD run by E. James), Punt Return (Walters 73), Kickoff Return (Walters 96) and interception (Doss 38). Other scoring included Manning to Stokely (13 yards), Manning to Wayne (53 yards), 2 Mike Vanderjagt field goals and I don't remember. All but 14 of my opponents points came in the second half when I focused my concerns on knocking out his last QB for the rest of the game. I passed for 450+ yards and rushed for 100. Great game for Louie and his Colts. It was 8:30 when I went back upstairs to start drinking. I wasn't going out because I had my own stuff to drink, and I wasn't gonna pay for what I had for free. I had a pint of Bacardi 151, a pint of Hennessey and a bottle of Absolut Citron. I'd like to thank an anonymous donor for supplying me. We started around 9 pm. Me, Jameel (aka Jamal when I been drinkin) and Keith were going shot for shot whether it was 151, Henney or Absolut. We had lemon drops, which is a shot of 90% liquor 10% lemonade. Thats some good stuff, it makes it go down so easy, by the end of the night, it was like breathing. That is not good, thats how you become an alcoholic or something like that. But to become an alcoholic, you have to admit that you have a problem. And I won't say I have a problem, but I will say that I don't not have a problem. I was pretty messed up until I decided to take my drinks back to my room to watch a movie. I told everyone I was going to sleep, which I was, I was tired as all hell at 11:00 pm. Then I talked to my cousin and she had her stuff and I had my stuff and right as I was going to bed, I found myself on the third floor going lemon drop shot for lemon drop shot with my new buddy Todd. Later we played Scattegories. Scattegories is a game in which you roll a dice and it lands on a letter of the alphabet. With that letter of the alphabet you answer questions with answers that start with that letter. For example: the letter is J and the question is Boys names. You answer Jack and you get a point unless someone else answers Jack, then you get nothing. Its a great game, especially when you are drunk and you don't know obvious answers.
Things I am Learning...
After you've dranken enough, all the alcohol tastes the same.
When you are a college students and you are a guy you're in a tough situation. You either want to get with every girl non-stop, or you want a serious relationship. That is the two opposite ends of the spectrum there. That is the situation I am in, I am the kind of guy that wants to get into a serious relationship, but since thats not falling through you move to plan B...but what happens if plan B falls through.
College students partake in the most expensive habits and then complain about being broke. Drinking, Smoking and Starbucks. Man, if Starbucks wasn't so damn expensive, paying $5 to get into Cherry Pit, $1 for a shot, $2 for mixed drinks and $3 for mixed frozen drinks wouldn't be that bad. But no, its $5 for a strawberries and cream frappuccino, $1.75 for a carmel-fudge brownie. Smoking is expensive unless you go to Indiana, but thats so much harder when you're not in Chicago and Gary Indiana is right across the bridge.
Drinking isn't the problem, but thinking is. Thinking can get you in just as much trouble as drinking can.
College girls are major problems. They complain that they want equal rights, but then complain when they are handed responsibility. They complain that they want to be in major relationships but then they go sleepin around. They complain that they are called bitches, hoes and sluts. But then they go screaming up a storm because one hair is out of place and then go screwing everyone on the dormitory floor. They complain about all of the stereotypes that are given to college girls, but then they fit all of them. Its like self-fullfilling prophecy. But hey thats college, crazy shit happens.
News and Sports
News reports out of Colombia reported that Colombian rebels were planning to assassinate President Bush, but that the rebels had nothing to say about it. Did you really expect them to say anything, really? Did you really expect for rebels to reveal their plans to the whole world when it came to assassinating the leader of the free world. "Hi, we are planning to assassinate President Bush Friday December 3rd at 1:23 pm Eastern Standard Time while he is eating at Taco Bell at 1234 Drug Deal Drive. Jose will be our sniper at the Taco Burrito Queen across the street. Our operatives include the Taco Bell manager Don Juan, the waitress Maria and me, Don Papi." Yeah, didn't think so. Them hispaniks iz knot ass stoopid az u wood theenk.
Steriod Watch is on now. Giambi came out of the closet, Bonds admitted but said he didn't know he was using it. So who's next? I'm going with Jim Edmonds, who has Cali roots as a former Anaheim Angel. He never hit more than 30 HRs and was never healthy in Anaheim. He goes to St. Louis all of a sudden he hits 40 HRs, he's steriod man. Sammy Sosa, nah, he used them Flintstone vitamins. Don't know about you, but I used Flintstones at 5, not 35. But hey maybe hes catching up on what he didn't have as a kid.
Notre Dame football is now on the bottom of the list of respectable football programs. They fire Tyrone Willingham after 3 years of his 6 year term after going 21-15, 6-5 and a bowl game. They try to hire their guy in Utah who has an out clause to come to ND. But he ditches them to go to Florida and now ND is caught with their pants down with rampant rumors of racism (firing their first and only black coach to possibly hire a white coach after the black coach finishes with a winning record.)
If #1 USC loses to UCLA, #2 Oklahoma loses to Colorado in the Big 12 Championship game and #3 Auburn loses to #15 Tennessee in the SEC title game, that would leave Utah and Boise State as the only two undefeated teams in college football. And guess what, they wouldn't get the national title bid would they. So who would? California, Texas & Louisville all have only one loss. Louisville has the best offense in college football while Texas has arguably one of the top defenses and top rushing offenses. And California is the only team in the last 2 years to beat USC.
Who is the best team in college basketball? #3 University of Illinois beat #1 Wake Forest. Kansas was a pre-season favorite and is the #2 team in the country. Duke is always up there, the defending national champs are still undefeated. Syracuse is still good and young and North Carolina is the most dangerous open court team in the country...so who's #1?
Well, thats it for now, time to eat. I think, I'm starving, gotta go find food.
HOLLER!