Thursday, December 07, 2006

And Now Presenting PART TWO of Poetry Slam

Ahh, finally I got another work of poetry finalized for my portfolio. Though the last poem 'Gone' still has some unfinished business. My favorite thing about that last poem is that it could have been interpreted in so many different ways, it's great. I've had several friends ask who it's referencing, etc. So without futher ado, another poem that references my personal life, 'Missed Connections.'

by Luis C. Medina

Her eyes held me hostage
alone under dimmed light
and ominous discomforting silence
I was out of place, out of my mind
attempting to capture her heart.
Needing direction, love had me down
unsettled back roads lost while losing her;
and those sweet southern lips
that weren’t meant to be mine again.
Her wicked ways and poisonous kiss had me spellbound
as for her trick, a disappearing act.
Miscast as Miss Right, Miss Right Now
was a complete miss.

To be honest this is the fourth or fifth revision to this poem, so I hope people like it. The original had three stanzas which consisted of the girls I was referencing in this poem, and a closer stanza that tied them all together. I dropped the final stanza, and merged the other three stanzas (and the girls represented) into a one stanza poem. I cut out some unneed words and descriptions, or as I like to call it "cut out the fat."

FINAL NOTE: 'Missed Connections' was a poem that came with a lot of negative connotation from classmates and friends alike. Originally it was intended to be a list poem based off of the idea "the girls I kissed" which turned into "the girls i DIDN'T kiss" which turned into missed opportunities. As for the inspiration of the revision, I'll give some credit to Jay-Z's song "Dig A Hole" on his new album "Kingdom Come." I actually came up with the idea of rolling the three stanzas into one after this line "Why don't you get at ole boy? Why kill a puppet and keep Ghepetto alive?" Well, loosely based. The way I see it, putting 'em all together simplified everything in this poem. Thanks Jay!

Coming soon: Hopefully I'll have another poem revised. I've got a dilemma on my hands and don't know how to solve it (yet) and coming some time really soon Lu's Year In Review! And of course, suprises on the way!

BONUS: From the original creative writing genius of my family and her interpretation of my poem:
  • Sounds night stand or stood up by miss miss or just a slow dance that never quit completed the play. tantalizing.
  • u know i usually like seductress type/heartbreakers characters as my main characters, but interesting to read that from a guys point of view--u really got the less empowered side of hearbreaking but did it without totally dogging her out as a slut or as not sexy anymore, lou. thats hard to do.
  • poetry being the most powerful words in the least lines, or something like that. im impressed.

If you have thoughts, I'd like to hear them!

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