Monday, January 23, 2006

This One's Inspired, So It Should Be Good (and potentially long winded)

Well folks, it's been a relatively quiet Monday. And that folks has been a blatant lie! Sorry I had to do that, I had to get some attention somehow. So, I've decided to break down what's going on in my mind in sections, so it's relatively clear. And then maybe, I could get some feed back from the 2 people who actually read this (one of them being myself) and put something together. So here goes nothing
Alright, let's get this one started off right! As you the loyal reader knows, ever since movie night last Thursday, my mind has been churning, thinking and trying to figure shit out. I've been searching for answers, reasons, anything that can help me make sense of what happened and maybe give me an inkling on what could happen potentially in the future. First, I'd like to point out that in my blogging, I use the word "potential" a lot (between this site and the site dedicated to the Cubs) so yeah, gotta love that big 'P'-word. So, now that I'm completely sober, I can correctly assess what's gone on since that night. Saturday, the POTENTIAL of a POTENTIAL "date" was set up with the way I handled things after the movie. However, things didn't go as I thought they would. Should I have expected it, sure, for the simple fact that I am a believer (and always have been a believer) that the past is a good indication of what can/will happen in the future, no matter how far removed you are from it. Now did I take it the wrong way, yes and I'll admit that. Did I have a helping hand in that, yes and that was alcohol (a depressant of course.) No reason for me to react the way I did, but it makes sense that that was the way I would react. Well, back to thoughts. So, I did some research because well, there were a lot of questions left unsolved. Those questions involved motivation, whose idea it was, stuff like that. Well, I got some answers. So, the motivation was purely on the part of the guys and girl of floor 14, the friends of the program as I like to call them sometimes. I guess one of them found out she liked me, mentioned something to my roommate and then he put wheels in motion. Now, since then, I don't know what happened. I wish I did, so then I could assess my situation. The night went well, the next days conversation went well, just Saturday night fell through. It's something like THAT that makes me think that my past will tell me what will happen in the future. So, basically since Saturday night fell through, I was hoping that would have been a stepping stone night, but it never came to fruition (or frutation according to my main man Joe Carter.) So here goes nothing, I got a weekend ahead of me with nothing planned. I actually just finished talking to her and she seemed as if she wouldn't be objective to maybe an encounter this weekend. I'll probably ask her if she either wants to go to the game tomorrow or if she wants to go out Saturday, either to Fred's Country Dance Barn or out to the house parties and bars. If she doesn't go out, depending on who goes to Fred's, I'll go. If not it'll be a weekend of rest and relaxation. Time for me to takeover the reins of the game (for now at least.)
So I'm walking back to the dorms, kinda hurrying because it's almost 2 and that means one thing: The Boers and Bernsie Show!!!!! The only thing that I really look forward to when I get back from classes. So I take a look at my phone, says 1:59 so I know it's gonna go on soon and I still gotta start up my computer. I open the door and there's my roommate (who I anticipated should have been at class) and his girlfriend not necessarily fooling around, but yeah, something was going on up there and yeah, traumatized I was. And once again my words were taken out of context and used against me to make me look like a complete IDIOT by my roommate. That isn't the first time that has happened, hell it's happened twice in a relatively short period of time. Let's preface this by taking a look in the past. My roommate's girlfriend sent me a picture of her and her friends at the country barn. Now everyone knows my thing for country girls, so I told her that I was gonna put it as the desktop pic for my laptop. So, my roommate was there and we're talking about the pic, and there's a girl that is really pretty and I mean GORGEOUS and I just don't throw that term around, I'm quite picky for someone like myself. Anyways, I had said that she was hot, he thought that I was saying she was hotter than his gf which I didn't say that, I said she's on her level. So what does HE do? He goes and tells her that I said that her friend was hotter. Not as if it should bother anyone, I'm just saying, you know just to get the facts straight. Anyways yeah, let's just say that statement that wasn't made has been used against me in recent memory. Back to the current statement in which I said "I need to get drunk to get this memory out of me." Now simply put, think about it. Remember Bernstein Principle #1: LISTENING IS A SKILL!!!!! I'll preface this by referencing the Boers and Bernsie show where Berns said that AJ Hawk is dating a transvestite (Brady Quinn's sister because his assessment of Quinn's sister is that she looks like a man) and a caller called and asked "What is this I hear about AJ Pierzynski dating a transsexual?" and then a transsexual called and yeah, just all hell broke out for that show. One of the better shows of recent B&B history. So, back to the story. What I meant by that (which I followed up my statement with a CLEAR explanation of what I meant by it if anyone was listening) was that I wanted to get the vision of what could have happened (cuz it coulda been worse they coulda been fucking) and things of that nature. Need we forget that in the beginning of the year I had a crush on her while he was still with the current ex-girlfriend. And we DID have a conversation about him potentially hooking me up with her. But I guess I shoulda just tried it myself because A) I know him and B) It's happened before where A was supposed to hook me up with B and A hooked himself up with B by talking shit about me. Not a good memory, so let's just think about something. Everytime they're together, I'll be honest, I think about what it would be like if it was me and not him. I said it in the beginning that he didn't deserve her, and that I woulda been a better fit but you know, I guess I was born with too much of a tan for white girls and not enough tan for the black girls. And well latina girls, well let's just say i fell for one once and I have never got up since then. So yeah, chew on that for a moment. So yeah, we have one big ole' misunderstanding that once again, I'm in the middle of it. So, what else is new? I'll end this section with a big ole' LISTENING IS A SKILL!!!!!!!!!
I guess we should begin the Valentine's Day Countdown since I'm being reminded of it left and right ever since NEW YEAR'S DAY! 22 days until Valentine's Day and let's just say I'm ready for a new approach for a day that has haunted me and will probably continue to haunt me until something GOOD happens for a change! I'd like to specifically put last years V-Day massacre, or debacle or whatever in the rear view mirror. I do regret what I did, but I do NOT regret who I liked and I never will, she'll always be special to me. So, I've decided not to get unnecessarily drunk on that day like I did last year. Instead, I have decided to make myself Garlic Alfredo Pasta with chicken for myself, along with one of my famous cheesecakes and I'll hang out in my room and I might throw on a movie or I might play some video games, or heck I might even do some school related activities. I'll just stay away from Valentine's Day. But here's the kicker about the day I despise the most. There's a couple that I hold close to my heart, and both members of the relationship have asked me for assistance in helping them one up the other on Valentine's Day. One wants ideas, and one wants me to make a dish and ask for a MAJOR favor. Now, here's where my mind and my heart play a major role in this. Let's take this into consideration: I had something for this girl and I played a minor role in their hook up. Note that NEITHER knows that either has asked for my help. I'm NOTORIOUS for helping people on Valentine's Day, but this I thought was a little bit of yeah: A) Pulls a little to hard at the heart strings and B) made me feel uncomfortable, actually a better word would be awkward and C) I wouldn't be getting much if anything out of it. I know, I'm not about getting things outta people in return for my services, especially when the dish I am potentially to make its ingredients would be paid for, but that's beyond the point. What isn't beyond the point is this, I talked to some friends about this. Some here in the 'dale and some back in the Chi, you know people I confide in. They say no, and tell them both and tell them how you feel. Remember, I'm notorious for helping people be happy on valentine's day, and I'm notorious for helping my friends in situations like this. But this, I guess was the straw that broke the camels back. The next few weeks should be interesting to say the least
That's it for now folks, I hope you enjoyed today's version of "My So Called College Life: Year 2, Semester 2"

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